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Friday
Dec072012

haiku my heart ~ The Holiness of Motherhood



You ask me about motherhood,
and it takes more than seventeen syllables today…
For here I am,
barren, no children from my womb,
widowed, no husband at my side,
my mother, out in the world
finding herself for the first time
before
she steps from this world into the next,
having given me the ultimate gift of
her love and my life...
and I find myself undone,
again,
between worlds…
I seem to seek out slots for myself
that do not fit into the norm
of the world I live in.
I feel alien,
alone,
completely and utterly bereft of any kind of anchor
and I so much want to be a part of this earth
beneath my aging feet,
slipping off this suit of my youth,
wriggling into a skin that does not fit
the maid who dances
forever in my heart…
Don’t tell me to seek solace
from the all-great mother,
for she is this pain in me that has no voice,
this wail of loss that winds throughout all time of mothers
broken from war and grief,
from loving from a heart broken so many times,
patched together to shine
and break
again and again…
How I wish I had a simple haiku
to whisper the holiness of being a mother…

*****

For more Friday haiku my heart
and this special twelve days of honoring mother-love
please visit Rebecca and other poets
at recuerda mi corazon

Reader Comments (10)

Wow, you have touched on so much here. This is an achingly beautiful write. Your pain is palpable, the mourning and longing deeply felt as you have described it so richly. Peace, love and light to you~

December 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPoet Laundry

Thank you for sharing these words. You speak of a subject that I don't understand. For Motherhood is for the life-givers. I know nothing of the task and the feelings that come to those that do and don't bear fruit. Forgive me, and accept the offering of Peace.

December 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterspadoman

Your soliloquy merited much more than 17 syllables. Thank you for your eloquence. I know it is born of pain.

Mary in Disguise

December 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMagical Mystical Teacher

But in my hours of darkness,
When I am not even sure there is a Thou hearing my call,
I still call to Thee with all my heart.

What you wrote is incredibly truthful
and relatable...at least for me.
I hear you Lea.
♥♥♥

December 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpriti.lisa

When I took a poetry class, Lea, one of my favorite things to do was to find haikus hidden away in the works of others. I offer you this.

I feel alien
And find myself undone
Her love and my life

The ultimate gift
Stepping from this world to next
Holiness whispers

December 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterannie

With you I whisper...

Last Night’s Tea Flowers

December 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMark M. Redfearn

Beautiful, painful and powerful writing, Lea...

December 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDelphyne

Beautiful words....thank you.....thank you!

Ruby

December 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterForest Dream Weaver

ahhhh...the place of initiation...my how it is the most difficult to walk thru...yet rich in its compost...I hold you close my dear heart...excited to see what comes from this...where you are headed...what emerges...& so soooo understanding the ENORMITY of it all...REALLY?? Do I have to go thru THIS???...our Guidance has no problem with temper tantrums...can't I know NOW? The preparation is immense, unbearable, heart wrenching...I soooo love you...you touch the heart of everyone you meet precious Lea ❤

December 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCyndee

Your beautiful words
voice the universal truth
of ultimate love

December 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterShirley Prochnau

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